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Sunday, May 22, 2011

Oh Rapture!

I don't pretend to know the mind of God, although I'm pretty sure He gets His laughs watching the Weather Channel. So while I watched the announced Rapture proceedings with a raised eyebrow this weekend, I couldn't help noticing that a few items around my house have gone missing. Even though I may be tempted to look suspiciously at possible suspects in my living room, I'd like to point out. . .

Ten Things at My House That May Have Been Raptured This Weekend:

1. My car keys.

2. The last two chocolate chip cookies. Also, the equivalent of a glass of milk.

3. My other shoe.

4. The dollar bill that was hidden in the junk drawer under the nail clippers.

5. The points of all my pencils.

6. The lid to the grape jelly.

7. My deposit slips.

8. My original Alvin and the Chipmunks Christmas album.

9. The pliers I use to turn off the hot water.

10. The dog’s food—the bag is empty!

On second thought, cross number ten off the list. There is a suspicious trail of crumbs leading to someone's sleepy pillow beside the couch.


Anonymous said...

No, He gets his laughs watching Us, 'nuff said!


Deb Claxton said...

I think all my ball point pens have been raptured. Whenever I need to write down an important phone message - I can never find anything to write with. Or else I finally find one after making people hold for 5 minutes and there's no ink left in it!

Linda Cody said...

Hee! My favorite was "the pliars I use to turn off the hot water." You never know what will turn out to be holy in your house hold!

Love ya,
Linda and Birdie Puggins

Beth Bartlett said...

LOL, awesome list! The cookies and the dog food may have been raptured to the same location. ;)